I know that there are a few of us out there trying to understand on some level what makes kids so picky!  Researchers and scientists have long taken up the topic, and now, at least in my area, a TV program devoted to the subject will be airing on local PBS stations to discuss the topic.  The episode called “Smell; Taste” is part of a series, Human Senses.  The show promises to tell us exactly what is the most disgusting smell known to humankind.  Should be fun!

One of the pleasures of living in wine country is the easy access to all things grape and wine related.  Harvest has ended early this year, but we made it to a winery in time to see the production process in full swing.  Although Monkey is too young to drink wine, she has certainly seen her parents drink enough of it to recognize the special glasses when they appear on the table and request a sip on occasion.  Showing her the grape sorting and crushing and fermenting process was a great deal of fun, and at this stage of the game it’s all still grape juice – perfect for sampling.   If you’re lucky enough to bring home some juice from a visit to a winery, try this recipe for sorbet:

Grape Juice Sorbet

3 cups of grape juice

1 cup sugar , divided into quarter cups

Dissolve the sugar into the grape juice, a quarter of a cup at a time, adding only enough sugar until it tastes good to you.  Place the mixture in the refrigerator until it is very cool, at least 4 hours.  Freeze in an ice cream maker, according to the manufacturers instructions.  Store in freezer in popsicle molds or freezer-proof container.

We were a bit nervous about trying something new, especially since we’ve been bombarded with “no!”s when new food appears on the table.  (We’re working on “no, thank you,” too.)  Maybe the stars were aligned this day, but Monkey ate clam chowder with gusto.  Of course, we were in clam chowder country, up in the Northwest, where every bowl is better than the last one.  It’s not something I’ve attempted at home, and canned clam chowders are often not very tasty.  What a thrill when Monkey moved her dad out of the way and gulped the rest of his soup.  Maybe that’s the trick – just have her taste our food, but order her favorites when we’re out at restaurants.

I’ve gotten so used to a turned up nose that sometimes it feels like the norm.  Gratefully, I’m discovering that it’s not all about the food.  I’ve been killing myself to deliver VARIETY when in reality I think my monkey would be happier with the standards and a better presentation.  To that end, I’m experimenting more with colors on the plate and, since she is a girl, accessories.  By accessories, I mean straws, fun utensils, placemats and plates – anything to make eating together more about the dining experience and less about “please, PUH-lease take two bites of the soup, and then you can have the clementine.”   One of my friends calls it distraction.  A rose by any other name, I say.  I’m all for peaceful meals, and for me that means less on the floor, less waste and less whining.  In the meantime, I’ve invested in some crazy straws.  I’m channeling my own craziness out of the meal prep and into the straws.  It seems to be working.

Tomato season is drawing to an end, so we didn’t want to waste an opportunity to have some fun with tomatoes from our garden.  Monkey was delighted to create this smiley face, with some help from me.  We also made other faces before slicing them up and eating them in a salad.

Part of the whole “dial down the picky eater-ness” philosophy is to connect kids with where their food is made.  On a road trip this summer, we were delighted to spend some time at the Rogue Creamery in Central Point, OR.  It’s not a huge shop – but it has all the essentials.  There is a large glass window into the cheese-making area, a sampling area along with some cheese paraphernalia, and a couple of deli counters with bricks and logs and wheels of some very divine cheese.

Monkey especially liked sampling.  To her credit, for a 2 year old, she did watch the video about the cheese-making process and seemed to get that it would be an excruciating wait before the milk that was being hauled in at that moment would be available in a cheese form.  She was also mildly disappointed that there wasn’t any goat cheese – her favorite.  Nevertheless, the kind people behind the counter gave her tastes of some exceptional cheeses like the Rogue River Blue and the Oregonzola (how many toddlers like blue cheeses?).  I think they converted her by the time we left.

P.S.  If you go, there is a chocolate store next door called Lillie Belle Farms that serves up heaven in little chocolate squares.  Save time to visit both places.

We’ve been really experimenting with the garden – table connection, and having a lot of fun with it.  Not too long ago, Monkey had a couple of friends over and we set them up with some seedlings, water and soil.  Each girl planted some plants that we had on hand waiting to go in the ground anyway.  We used cardoon, pole beans and strawberry plants, but you could use anything appropriate for your zone (talk with someone at your local nursery).  It has been wonderful to watch the plants grow and the girls come by to check on them and snack right off of the plant.  (Once again, I’m able to maintain my hands off, raw food, vegan philosophy on the table without hitting anyone over the head with it.)  The best part is that the girls treat these fresh off the vine fruits and veggies as treats!

Want to cook for a picky toddler?  (Now, I know you shouldn’t actually use the word “picky” in front of your little one – but feel safe to vent, I meant write, it on this site.)  As with everything that I try, I learn that it all comes down to the basics, right down to the equipment.  Cooking well requires, at a minimum, some decent pots, pans and knives.  Pictured are two recent acquisitions, which have made turning on the stove a breeze.  These are both by All-Clad – one is a Stainless Steel 12-inch Fry Pan and the other is a Stainless Steel 4-Quart Saute Pan.  Don’t ask me what makes the pans work so well.  All I know is that the heat seems to distribute evenly throughout the pan, everything slides right out and they are a snap to clean.

Here’s a quick tomato sauce to make in your saute pan. Try it and I think you’ll agree that having the right pans makes this already simple recipe practically effortless.

Quick Tomato Sauce

• Approximately 3 pounds of heirloom tomatoes, roughly chopped
• Around 1/4 cup of chopped herbs such as basil, oregano or marjoram
• Salt and Pepper to taste
• Olive oil to taste

Place tomatoes in saute pan over medium heat along with herbs.  Cover pan, but stir periodically.  Allow tomatoes and herbs to cook for about 10 minutes until they have softened.  Run the mixture through a food mill to get rid of the skins and seeds.  Place sauce back in saute pan along with salt, pepper and olive oil to taste (try out a couple of tablespoons) and then simmer until the sauce reaches your desired thickness.  Sauce may be kept in the fridge for about a week, or frozen for several months.

On our trip, we drove home via the Oregon Coast and we’re delighted to find Monk gobbling up the local seafood.  In fact, at a restaurant in Newport, OR called Local Ocean Seafood she could not be contained.  She devoured the ahi tuna skewers along with the salmon of the day and insisted on having her photo taken in front of the fresh fish case.

Incidentally, we also visited the Oregon Coast Aquarium in Newport and it was perfect for her age group.  She loved the underwater fish tanks and getting to pet sharks!

My friend in Oregon has two kids – a 6 yo girl and a 3.5 yo boy.  She’s been through it.  I asked her how she dealt with the frustration of the “terrible twos” since I’ve find myself to not quite be myself at the end of the day.  Here are her very helpful thoughts:

For the kid(s):

1. Distract, distract, distract.  Instead of harping why s/he can’t do something, she says her MIL always says, “I’ve got something to show you in the car.”  And it might be a speck of dust but the kids never catch on!  Amazing.
2. Praise the behavior you want.  I’m not so good at this yet, but remember to catch your child doing something well and praise that behavior.  Monk has been having some sleeping difficulties and I’m finding that the thing that works best is praising like mad when she stays in bed for nap or quiet time.
3. Offer alternatives.  Instead of asking where Monk wants to go, its better for both of us if I simply give her two options.  ”Do you want to walk to your room, or do you want mommy to carry you?”
4. Use “when … then” statements.  Most toddlers live in the moment – a trait I really admire – but its hard for them to understand that our appointment starts in 15 minutes and we should have left half an hour ago.  To speed up the process, my friend recommended, “When you get in the car, then you can have a sticker [your teddy bear, your book, etc.]“

Quite honestly, there was one more I think but I’ve found these 4 to be the most helpful so far.  My sweet little two year old is returning.

For the parent(s):

• Try controlling your wake up time so you get he peace you need.  My friend sets her clock a half hour before her kids usually wake up so she can have a cup of tea and enjoy some time to herself.
• Meditation really works.  Grab 10 minutes to yourself at some point in the day and clear your mind. 10 minutes is all it takes!
• Keep trying, remember its a phase, and don’t be afraid to laugh about it!

One of my theories about kids and food is that the more they are connected with the source of the food, they are more likely to eat it. In the case of processed food, its almost impossible for a kid to understand the various parts and powders and additives. But with fruit and vegetables, the challenge is limiting how much they eat off the vine or out of the dirt (at least in my case.) On a recent trip to the wine country area of Oregon, we went blueberry picking and I think it would have been wiser for the owners to have weighed the kids as they entered and then exited.  Monk’s bucket simply did not reflect all she had picked and eaten.  But she loved it and now she’s tuned in to how and where blueberries grow (and how good they taste fresh off the bush).

Since we’ve been talking about tea and playhouses in the last month, I wanted to post a pic of what real ingenuity (and time on your hands thanks to retirement) can do. This is a playhouse built by my father-in-law for his five grand daugthers. It is fantastic. An adult can almost stand completely in it, there are shelves and a play stove inside – along with all kinds of kitchen accoutrements – and outside there is a picnic table, windsock, windows, doorbell, and wind chimes. He used only scrap material he had around his place or that he found at garage sales.
As I’ve always maintained, sometimes getting kids to eat is all about the place. Location, location, location! Monkey spent hours playing and eating in this playhouse.

This little tea party was put together by my father-in-law, and believe me it was a huge hit with Monk.  She couldn’t get enough of pouring, and then drinking, the water.  We were all drafted, I mean invited, to attend the tea party.  Eventually we moved into snacks which included Pepperidge Farm Goldfish instead of the traditional toast and jam. It didn’t matter to monk: she’s had toast and jam before, but now goldfish are her newfound love.

Monk loves to put her shoes on her self.  Who am I kidding?  These days, everything is “No Mommy.  I want to do it myself!”  In order to help her determine left from right, because inevitably the shoe would end up the wrong foot, we invested in these little doo-hickeys (at some places they are called jibbitz, or any other name) and since then there has been no confusion.  The stars go on the right foot!